Return of the keyboard

Today is an exciting day for me. Today is the day I realised my keyboard I've been waiting patiently to receive was delivered 2 weeks ago - still adjusting to the US way of doing things and figuring it out as I go.
I never knew how much I loved being able to type until my life was reduced to an onscreen keyboard. I got what I paid for - my Chinese keyboard off ebay has a good chunk of the keys labelled incorrectly, but nothing some key stickers won't fix!

Today is also the day I found out my city service. Let me explain. 
I am at a Bible college, which, around here, we joke is not a "proper" Bible college, because at the end of it, I don't end up with any "real" qualification. We cover some level of the history and structure of the Bible, but by no means at the depth of a typical Bible college. Instead, our focus is on connecting with God, through the Bible and by talking to him, following his directions, enjoying his company, and learning to extend the security this brings to how we relate to other people. That's the short version anyway!

Part of this experience involves finding ways to help out within the local community, feeding the homeless, providing support for the elderly, the youth, single parents, people with disabilities, people who have gone through traumatic events, cleaning up parks, etc, which most of us participate in on Thursdays. We had to apply for the ones we wanted and rank them in order of preference. My top choice was a writing one (go figure!), where I get to find stories of people in the community who have done heroic things, interview them, and write blogs about them. The only problem was there were only 8 spots, and in a class of 1400 first year students, there were quite a few more than 8 others better qualified for the job than me. However the interview went really well, and I came out of it with the feeling of peace I've experienced in every past interview I knew I was meant to get. Today I found out I got in! The excitement I feel is beyond ridiculous.

One thing (of many) I've been learning recently is that I don't have to be afraid of mess. In the past I have avoided a lot of things, or shut down parts of my life, because I've been afraid of mess. I've been afraid that people would misinterpret my intentions, that conflict would be left unresolved, that tasks would be left incomplete, that goals would be left unfulfilled.

But I've been placed in this group of about 70 people within our class, whom I like to call my Rambunctious Group, but will from hereon out refer to as my RG. They're like a giant family where it's okay to be messy, where people always think the best of each other and look for the best in each other. I am growing so much! I am learning so much about myself, about people, but mostly just about love. They've shown me over the last week in particular that I can be vulnerable, I can be weak, I can say things they don't agree with or see things in a different way, but they still accept me and show me honour and affection. Not because they know me well, or in some cases have even had a conversation with me, but because they trust my intentions, something that works both ways and is beautiful to be a part of. 

And I'm learning that it is the same with God. He's not bothered by my messes, by what I perceive to be failures, or by people's responses to me, because he trusts my intentions. This blows my mind, in all his majesty and might, he chooses to leave me with a will to make my own decisions and do as I please, fully trusting me.
So my keyboard is back, and with it more regular updates, which I keep promising, but it's for real this time! Thanks beautiful friends and family for your support. You guys are the best. Talk soon.