Welcome to reality

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Hope.

 It's a funny ol' word that stirs up varying emotions in different circumstances. Though some may call it wishful thinking, for me, Hope has often proved herself to be one of the most powerful little words in my possession. The instant her presence is noted she cannot be wished away. Instead she transforms the outlook of everyone and everything she comes in contact with. Without a single iota of change to a situation, she appears and switches up entire atmospheres. She embodies life, invokes courage, empowers change.

 As you might be able to tell, I'm quite a fan of hope. However, of late, I've found her quite elusive.

 It's been a rough week. Through a combination of events that were no one's fault in particular, I've been dealing with the challenge of adjusting to a new curriculum in a new country with vastly difference procedures, systems and approaches to doing things from how I am accustomed. I have 200 students' names to learn, seven classes to teach, several new software platforms to familiarise myself with, daily meetings to attend (in some cases requiring me to set relief work), weekly homeworks to provide to each class and mark, and a test to mark for a class I've seen twice, the first time in which I told them they wouldn't have a test yet, and the second time in which I gave them the test I'd told them I would delay but had to give to them anyway. The department head has been away so in some cases I'm still not sure what topics I'm meant to be teaching, let alone what the expected requirements are at each level. And with all of this going on, my body decided it was the perfect time for the flu, so I could lose my voice and my firm, strict behaviour management plan could go out the window.

 But enough grizzling. Back to hope.

 I opened my curtain this morning and for the first time since I've been here, I saw blue sky.  Sometimes the littlest things make a world of difference. With the sun casting its golden glow over the cottage rooftops, and the slightest touch of colour in the sky, I find hope has somehow snuck back in the room and ambushed me. So, with the same mountain of challenges ahead as were present last night, but none of the anxiety, I begin my day sincerely grateful that hope has come through for me once more.
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 "Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a promise fulfilled is a tree of life" ~Proverbs 13:12

Comments

  1. Nicola Donaldson9 January 2018 at 10:28

    Keep your chin up.. or change jobs! Teaching in the UK for ten weeks had me spending evenings looking for a different career path and questioning why I ever wanted to be one in the first place. Their system doesn't care about kids at all, just testing and proving you're teaching - not that they're learning. If it's not working for you after a while then get a job in a pub and focus on looking around where you live and travelling :)

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    Replies
    1. Aimee9 January 2018 at 12:16

      Thanks Nic! I feel like I've been pretty spoilt with the school I've ended up at, especially the department I'm in, so not quite ready to throw the towel in just yet! But I totally get the frustration and discouragement, the pointlessness and wondering why did I even bother coming here? But I'm sure things will start looking up from here :)

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  2. Unknown9 January 2018 at 11:20

    You're a gutsy girl Aimee. Winners never give up. We are so proud of you. We love you heaps.💓

    ReplyDelete

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